Amanda Schoenbeck-Celebrating Women

Amanda Schoenbeck and I “met” at work. I put “met” in quotations because we’ve only ever met virtually, via conference calls and team meetings. Nonetheless, her enthusiasm and initiative caught my attention immediately. One of my favorite things about Amanda is her yearning to foster the things we used to be accustomed to in a traditional workplace, before remote work, Slack channels, and email became the norm. From sharing a running app with co-workers to always encouraging and praising others for their contributions, Amanda is present, positive, and proactive.

Her vulnerability is another of my favorite qualities, and that authenticity shines in the following Q&A, Celebrating Women. I have a feeling you’ll enjoy reading the Chicago-based freelancer/student‘s answers as much as I did.

AMANDA SCHOENBECK

You've got two minutes to tell me your life story in an elevator
How do you respond?

I would introduce myself as a full-time freelancer, business owner, and student. I am also training for my first marathon this year. I have 2 cats, an amazing husband, Nathan, and I live in Chicago. I love a dimly lit restaurant and live music. A few years ago, I was in a very dark place, and my life looked very different. Now I am in my “doing all the things that I have always wanted to do” era, and I could not be a happier person today.

What pivotal experience shaped who you are as a woman and continues to guide you today?

A defining moment in my life was when I decided to ask for help with my addiction. I was in a barren room with a mattress on the floor, all alone. I was headed towards homelessness when I called my parents for help. I spent the next 5 years in and out of rehab and different treatment centers. It was all a joke to me until it wasn’t. Eventually, I took sobriety seriously.

Sobriety has shaped me into someone I am genuinely proud of today. But truthfully, it was the experience of active addiction that taught me the most. I learned how to be kind, how to hustle, and how to rely on myself. I gained life skills that I would not otherwise have. That journey taught me resilience, and it changed the way I carry myself in the world. It was a tough road of self-discovery, and I am so grateful to be on the other side.

In what ways have perceptions of women evolved, and what still needs work?

This might be a little off topic, but I recently have gone down this rabbit hole of lonely men. Recently, I’d say in the last 10ish years, there has been an epidemic of lonely men. And this loneliness is directly tied to women advancing in society. As women in our society have become more educated and have successful careers, they are buying homes, and their “needs” for men are shifting. Women are no longer looking for men for survival or stability; they are looking for partners. Equal partners, emotionally available partners who will take care of the domestic duties equally. Now this is a wild generalization, but I find it to be so interesting.

That said, women are not done advancing, and there is still a lot of room for improvement. There are double standards that continue to hold us back, especially in the workplace. Assertiveness in men is seen as leadership, but in women, it is still too often labeled as being aggressive. There are so many examples like that. But I do see a shift happening.

When I compare what my life looks like today to what my grandmother’s life looked like, it is clear we have come a long way. It is leaps and bounds from what it used to be for women, but we still have work to do.

Share a time when you felt underestimated or overlooked because of your gender, and how you responded to that challenge.

Honestly, I never have felt underestimated because I am a woman. For me, it was more about feeling underestimated because I didn’t have an education or because I came from a blue-collar family. I can’t recall a time that being a woman held me back, but I can recount times where I was not taken seriously because I did not have the degree, or I did not speak the corporate language, or I did not carry myself with the kind of confidence people expect. There was a lot about the inner workings of the world and society, in general, that I had to figure out.

I respond to challenges by doing. I like to achieve quietly. I think there are a lot of people in my life who would be shocked to see where I am today. I do not think anyone expected much from me, and a part of me feels like I won. Not because I proved anyone wrong, but because I can.

What does empowerment mean to you, and how do you actively cultivate it in yourself and other women?

True empowerment means actions that make you feel powerful. For me, what makes me feel powerful is constantly challenging myself. Since I got sober, I went on a mission to experience life in a way I never could before. Once I got the opportunity to really start living my life, I was off.

I got back into school (I’ll be graduating with my bachelor’s next year), I saved and bought a condo, and now I am looking at investment properties as my next financial move. Plus this year I’ll be running my first marathon. How I decide to live my life makes me feel empowered. I want to continue to push myself to new heights.

When it comes to empowering other women, I lead by example. I lead by sharing my story, and I lead by living with integrity. I have an amazing group of friends that I love celebrating their wins with. They inspire me to keep going, and I hope I inspire them to do hard things.

If you could speak to your younger self, what wisdom/encouragement would you share about womanhood, strength, and self-worth?

I would tell my younger self that it is going to be alright. I would tell her that she has so much power and strength, and one day she is going to learn how to use it. I would tell her that the pain is temporary and that things will not always feel this heavy.

I would let her know that if she keeps going, there is a beautiful life waiting for her. There is a partner who loves her, a couple of cats, and a condo she owns in Chicago. I would tell her how smart she is, how business savvy she is, and that one day it will all come together. She will run her own business and work for herself. She just has to keep going.

"Healing does not follow a schedule, and neither does joy."

Amanda Schoenbeck Tweet

What’s one thing you’d let go of if it meant feeling lighter, and why?

My fear of being too late. I have spent the last few years trying to experience everything I missed in my twenties because I was trapped in addiction. It has been a journey, but sometimes that journey makes me second-guess my own joy. I catch myself wondering if I missed my window, if I am playing catch-up in a world that celebrates early success.

But healing does not follow a schedule, and neither does joy. I am learning to trust that it is never too late to build a life that feels full, aligned, and unapologetically mine.

Which woman, whether personal or public, inspires you, and why?

When I think of a woman who inspires me, Tiffany Willis comes to mind. She is the Senior Vice President of Investor Relations with Starbucks. I had the opportunity to hear her speak at a recent conference I was at. Her story is full of hardship and struggles, and statistically, she should not be as successful as she is today. I learned so much about how personal struggles can be a fuel for personal triumph. I saw myself in her story as she spoke, and although she has no idea who I am, I carry her story along with me when I need a little encouragement.

Anything else you'd like to share?

I would share that it is never too late to change your destiny and rewrite your story.

Amanda, I want to express my sincere gratitude for your willingness to share your story with The Road Linds Travels. The honesty, transparency, and insights were an incredibly refreshing addition to the Celebrating Women series. And I think I can speak for many when I say I look forward to witnessing all the ways in which you’ll continue manifesting a beautiful life that is fully aligned and unapologetically yours.

Linds

Los Angeles, California